WHY ARE GODLY MEN AND WOMEN SCARCE FOR MARRIAGE?

Recently, in sharing with a couple of singles on the subject of marriage on "How to Overcome Delay in the Pursuit of Marriage," I gave five reasons why people experience such delays. The first was immaturity, the second a curse, the third slackness, the fourth the lack of intelligence, and the fifth the absence of godly people. 

In my lifetime thus far, I have heard many single ladies say, "Pastor, where are the guys? There are not so many guys in the church." The single guys also seem to say the same thing. To an extent, they're right. This is the reason you easily find these Christians end up fantasizing with the ungodly and settle for worldly spouses, suffering the consequences for a long time. You wonder why some of your ungodly friends get married quite easily? That's because they have more ungodly men and women as options than you have godly men and women! 

The question is; why are godly men and women scarce within your church, community, or city? Why don't these singles easily find the godly person to get married to? The answer is simple; the church is not winning souls enough! You see, a lot of these singles (or even some parents) who complain of the lack of godly men and women at their own local church, community, or city don't win souls! Where do we want the godly men and women to come from? They're out there in the world messing up themselves. There's someone's husband or wife who's still playing around with the world. So, a lot of these singles aren't seeing a good number of godly men and women because they're not yet won to Christ! It's this simple to understand. Godly men and women don't fall from Heaven; they're won and raised by the godly. What are you doing?

"When there is scarcity of who to get married to, then the church is not winning soul."

You see, when God our Father instructs us to win souls, there are so many benefits to that than you can even imagine. And having many godly men and women for spouses is just one of such benefits. A church, community, or city with more godly singles won't experience the delay issue with marriage. But we're to be sincere and ask these singles who are always complaining of no godly men and no godly women, "How many people have you won to Christ this year?". You'll be shocked by their answers. Some have won none in many years! So, others should win for you to get married to, right?

"Don’t be complaining about what you lack when you are doing nothing about it for others."

What these singles don't understand is that by winning someone, you may be winning someone's husband or wife, or even yours! In winning souls, you're adding good options to the church, city, or community. And by principle, what you're making to happen for others will be made to happen for you! He that waters shall himself be watered. If everyone of us commit to winning souls indeed, we're not going to have the delays in marriage because of the lack of godly men and women; none shall lack her mate!

Some people don't have an immaturity problem. Some are not under any curse. Some aren't slack to get married, and some are intelligent enough for marriage. However they're delayed by the lack of godly men and women, which they're very likely a cause too.

Psalms 12:1 is very clear about the possibility of the scarcity of godly men and women as a key reason for marital delays. It says,

"Help, LORD; for the godly man ceaseth; for the faithful fail from among the children of men."

Amplified Version says; "Help, Lord! For principled and godly people are here no more; faithfulness and the faithful vanish from among the sons of men"

The New Living Translation says, "Help, O LORD, for the godly are fast disappearing! The faithful have vanished from the earth!

That is pathetic, however a possibility even in a church, community, city, or nation today— the scarcity of godly men and women. If godly men are ceasing, reducing, and disappearing, if principled people are no more, and if faithful people are vanishing from amongst men, who then do our godly singles get married to? What we risk seeing is God's children compromising and going to get married to ungodly people and ending up enduring what they should be enjoying. Some may even end up losing their faith!

"Don’t invest so much in the development of your Christian life only to waste it on a stranger who doesn't know or honour God."

It will not be so if we all give in ourselves to soul winning. That is the instruction of God our Father for our collective good and for His glory! He has the best for us. But, are we going to obey? The Bible says,

"WHEN THE WICKED ARE MULTIPLIED, transgression increaseth: ..." (Proverbs 29:16).

Again, "When the wicked rise, men hide themselves: but when they perish, THE RIGHTEOUS INCREASE" (Proverbs 28:28).

Question; do you want transgression to multiply? Do you want people to keep hiding? Then do what is required to increase the righteous! We do so by being intentional, strategic, and passionate in winning souls. That your sibling, business partner, colleague, neighbor, etc., that you see daily should be your interest and target. That's someone's spouse for a godly marriage and family tomorrow. Your delay in winning them may be delaying you too, your children, siblings, or friends. So, we are told,

"The fruit of the righteous [is] a tree of life; and HE THAT WINNETH SOULS [IS] WISE" (Proverbs 11:30).

You see, soul winning is the demonstration of wisdom because it is doing the right thing that benefits you and others. Be wise. Soul winning is being spiritually fruitful. In fact, Daniel puts it this way:

"And they that be wise shall shine as the brightness of the firmament; and they that turn many to righteousness as the stars for ever and ever" (Daniel 12:3).

Winning souls makes you to shine; when you turn people to righteousness, you're enhancing your light, fragrance, and opportunities; you are in increasing grace upon your life. So, be wise in this regard. By winning souls, you're enhancing someone's marital opportunity; you're making it easy for someone to get a godly spouse, to build a godly family, and to increase righteousness upon the earth. This call is for everyone of God's children who want to please God and see His glory fill the earth (Habakkuk 2:14).

You see, as God's children, we all deprive ourselves of the beauty of life and God's excellent will when we take His Word for granted. True, you shouldn't be winning souls just because you want to get married or you want someone to get married. But wait; there are community and socio-economic benefits in so doing! If we don't want to keep hiding because ungodly men and women are more than the godly, then we must win souls for this present life and for eternity; we must bring people the good news of their salvation in Jesus Christ. As a Parent who wants to see your sons and daughters get married to godly spouses tomorrow, where do you want these godly men and women to come from? Who should win them to righteousness? 

If we want to build a strong Christian community everywhere with godly marriages, children, and families, we cannot fold out arms about God's instructions for soul winning and expect this to happen; we'll be deceiving ourselves. 

I challenge any single here who loves the Lord and who also wants to get married to take soul winning seriously. I challenge parents who want to see their children and grand children have many godly men and women in their time to take soul winning seriously. I challenge all of us who want to see righteousness increase in our communities, cities, and nation to take soul winning seriously. I challenge everyone of us who loves Jesus and His sacrifice to take preaching the gospel mandatory and not optional. Live for what Jesus died for, live for what has saved you, and live daily to serve the LORD.

May your service to the Lord in this manner leave an inheritance for your children's children. May you shine like the stars and firmament of heaven. May you be full of grace and diverse divine opportunities to do lots of righteous works for the Lord. Let the hearts of many rejoice through you, and let generations remember your name in Christ. 

Let's do what is right, and let's do so now.

Blessings!!!